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with helosthisshoe

[ooc: Continuation from this memebells thread. Possible triggers as the story continues (as with all Supernatural based stories).]

It was a few days later, and they had not really spoken on much besides trivial things since she returned and that weird mocking this ...thing... was doing to Sam.

She was getting really tired of it.

One morning, after showering and getting her things together (thankfully she didn't need to use his money to buy things since her accounts had just been frozen- simple enough to fix with a phone call), she sat on the edge of her motel room bed.

"Sam, we need to talk about what our next moves are gonna be," it was a start, and she was getting restless. To be honest, it was getting awkward for her.  She had never felt so left out before- sure, Sam and Dean seemed to have this secret language that no one but them seemed to get, but this time was different.  Jo knew nothing was the same, and Dean was gone, but she was here dammit, and she was alone, and as tough as she grew up to be as a hunter, she was still a girl who needed her friends. And she hated to see her friends like Sam was right now.  All she wanted was to hug him and tell him it was going to be okay, but she didn't believe it herself.  Who knew how long this thing brought her back for?  Or why it left them alone so far. And where the hell was Dean?

It was obvious thoughts were running through her head as she took a little too long tying up her boots, but her voice remained calm.

"We shouldn't stay in one place for too long. Either that thing hasn't found us yet, or he's playing with us.  We need to have a plan for both."

Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
helosthisshoe
Jul. 19th, 2012 02:01 am (UTC)
Sam looked up when Jo spoke up and he couldn't argue with that. Being stuck, frozen here wasn't helping anybody. It was just he didn't know what his next move should be... didn't know what this thing was or what it was planning for them. She was right though, they couldn't just stay here like sitting ducks.

"I'm all ears if you got something, Jo. Besides hitting the road, I mean."

It wasn't that he didn't want to be there, help her out and back onto her feet. It was just Sam was having a hard time believing she was really here or that she wouldn't be taken away. He'd literally lost everything and everyone he had and he couldn't set himself up for that again.

It was easier to put up a wall again, retreat some place safe where he didn't have to make himself vulnerable again. Bad thing was, Sam tended to get isolated when he did that, closed off entirely and maybe bordered on scary sometimes. He wrapped himself up in work to the point it was hard to see anything else.

He couldn't do that entirely with Jo here though. It was making things so much... harder. He was tired of fighting, but he couldn't give up. He shook his head, shrugged off those thoughts.

"Bobby's books are in storage... I think we should go get them out and see what we can find in them."
roadhousejo
Jul. 19th, 2012 06:33 am (UTC)
She let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding and stood up, gathering her bag. Okay, first part done, worst part still yet to come.

"Breakfast? That way we can get what we know on paper. Have something to look for when we're going through Bobby's things."

As she followed him out and put her bag in the car, she was quiet. Her mind was racing. Jo wasn't going to worry about disappearing, or being pulled back. She could worry about that later... or never. She was here, and she was going to make damn sure she took this as a second chance instead of a curse. She closed the car door. Now that THAT was decided (or at least put in the back of her mind), she decided to focus on Sam. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew she was just avoiding her own problem, but reasoned that they shared the same goal.

After putting her seat belt on, she made a scrutinizing face at him, still trying to think of the right thing to say to help him. If Dean was really gone for good (she felt a lump in her throat at the thought, but shook it off), then Sam was going to need someone there. She knew all about the demon blood and that bitch demon Ruby. That wasn't going to happen.

Not on her watch.

Speaking of watching, that's exactly what she had been doing since she got in the car. Jo was certain she'd have frown lines if she kept studying him that like.
helosthisshoe
Jul. 19th, 2012 06:42 am (UTC)
Sam wasn't planning on getting back on demon blood, even if there was some desperate little part that would probably always crave it, want that power again or the feeling of being in control again. He felt like he was spiraling so far out of control, he'd never get it back. He couldn't buy that Dean was gone for good, would do anything to get him back.

By the time they were settled in the car, he couldn't exactly ignore the way she was just... staring. It was more than a little uncomfortable, honestly. He shifted in his seat and hesitated turn the key in the ignition.

He felt his skin heat up a little under the sharp gaze, not sure what she was thinking. After a moment, he tried for a more casual look, forcing his lips to quirk up in something resembling a smile, even if it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Uh, something on my face, Jo?"
roadhousejo
Jul. 22nd, 2012 06:39 am (UTC)
"Nope," she answered, holding out the 'n' and popping the 'p.' Her arms were still crossed and her expression didn't change.

Finally, after a few more moments of studying his face, she gave up and sighed loudly, getting comfortable as they drove to the nearest diner. When it seemed like it would be just a quiet drive, she spoke up, seeming restless- which she had to admit, she was.

"Sam, I just don't get it. Dean just disappeared? I mean, what if he's..." Jo hesitated, knowing it was probably not the best thing to say, but needed to say it, "what if he's gone? For good?" Her last two words were quieter, almost as if it made it real to her as well. She was alive again, and Dean wasn't even there. It wasn't fair in more ways than one. To her or to his brother.
helosthisshoe
Jul. 22nd, 2012 01:25 pm (UTC)
Sam's hands tightened on the wheel, eyes narrowing on the road as he fought to keep his expression from darkening. This wasn't a conversation he wanted to have... with anybody. "After he killed Dick, yeah," he murmured.

"I should have been there with him, Jo. I should have been with my brother." Or done something. Maybe he should have been the one to disappear.

"I'll find him. I'm not giving up until I've tried anyway, so there's no reason to talk about that what-if yet."
roadhousejo
Jul. 27th, 2012 07:33 am (UTC)
"But there is a reason to talk about the 'what ifs.' We need to be prepared for anything, and that includes the chance that he's NOT anywhere on Earth." A thought occurred to her, and she tried to push it from her mind. What if she was raised as a replacement? Jo shook her head, that was probably exactly what this new monster was wanting her to think.

Her tone softened.

"Look, Sam, I'm not saying we give up on finding him. I'm just saying that unless we're both prepared for the worst, we're not gonna be at our best." She saw the diner up ahead, and grabbed a notebook and pen. As he parked and turned off the car, she turned to him, using the pen as a pointer. "And don't think I missed that 'I should have been there' crap. Shoulda, woulda, coulda. Dean's a big boy, and he makes his own decisions." Her pen lowered and concern filled her eyes. "Just like you would have done, and just like me and Mom did."
helosthisshoe
Aug. 5th, 2012 12:32 am (UTC)
Sam was quiet as he parked the car, holding tight to the wheel as he let those words sink in. He knew she was trying to help and he knew that he should listen... should try to. It just wasn't as easy as he would have liked. Losing Dean was never easy, was never something he could just accept, dammit. He bit his lower lip and let out a sigh.

"I know... I know that. I just wish-- I would have chosen to be with him. Done something, I don't know." But he'd been caught up, had to take care of other things. He knows that's what Dean would have wanted him to do though. He let out a sigh and tilted his head back against the seat, taking in a slow breath.

"Sorry. You're right... we need a plan."
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